Stuff to do when you're bored with the Web

1. Ego surfing
   Let's face it -- the only thing more gratifying than toiling over your Web page is finding other Web pages advertising your URL. A good Saturday afternoon can be completely wasted surfing all the major Web indices for references. Satisfaction value: Good. If you don't find anything, Poor. Don't say I didn't warn you.

2. URL Hopping
   Two variations on this one. First is to use bona fide technology (a la URouLette and others.) Poor man's method is far better ... start at a bookmarked page, and just click on links at each page until you dead-end. Repeat. For experienced players only: don't bother reading the stuff you come across. Satisfaction value: Fair. Extends to Good if worthwhile content is discovered (but quite difficult if using advanced rules).

3. Information Iron Man
   An Internet version of Operation. Pretend, just for a moment, that the Web is actually for research and education and all that bullshit. Try spending a full hour looking up useful information or researching a pressing social issue. Do not click on Dilbert or Playboy or Suck out of desperation. "It takes a very steady hand!" Satisfaction value: Good for the whips-and-chains crowd, Poor for just about everybody else.

4. Java Fun
   Okay, so everyone says that Java applets are just toys right now. This is a problem? The Web needs some lighthearted spiffy-izing, and Java provides a buzzword-compliant way to distribute cutesy gadgets. I've seen games, puzzles, and real waste-of-time kinda stuff, all object-oriented and all architecture neutral. You can twiddle an hour away on a PC or on a Mac! Ain't life grand? Satisfaction value: Good, until Netscape starts crashing, when it becomes merely Fair.