Reality ... who needs it?

1. Food, drink, and oxygen.
   Home-delivered essentials. Thank the gods for secure server transactions!

2. News
   Why get your hands messy handling that old-fashioned ink-and-pulp information delivery system?

3. Weather
   Why bother going outside when you can read about it from the comfort of your cubicle?

4. Friends
   Socializing is passe'. Anyways, friends of the physical variety just wind up borrowing stuff and forgetting to give it back.

5. Family
   I only have one family in the real world. In cyberspace, I can pick from millions!

6. Love
   And there's plenty of it in this warm little abode we call a multi-protocol packet-switch internetwork.

7. Money
   And they can just send the paycheck to my cyberbank.

8. Religion
   Besides, who wants to get up early Sunday morning and pray? Can't God work around my schedule?

9. Philosophy
   If only someone would make an HTML version of Gravity's Rainbow, I might actually finish it ... but if I do try, there's help.

10. Even waste disposal!
    Although you can't virtually relieve yourself, the office wastebasket works just as well -- and positioned correctly, you don't even have to stop surfing.