Jim Nelson
19 February 1997

That's why I'm positive you would have never seen "The Simpsons and Smoking" list without the web. Here's something even the anti-smoking and "concerned parent" groups would never have dreamed of compiling. Every instance of a lit cigarette touching the lips of a Simpsonss character is painstakingly detailed within. They even caught Krusty the Klown pasting nicotine patches all over his body.

No wonder those with a passion for detail gravitate to the Internet. Even Purgatory doing research in the Library of Congress is more desirable than facing Alta Vista's dreaded "Documents 1-10 of about 400000 matching the query, in no particular order". Of course, if you're trying to compile "The Top 1000 Reasons Why Velvetta Tastes Better Than Cheese", this is a Godsend.

Still, with all this retentiveness out there, why haven't we seen collections like "Canonical List of Misapplied Conspiracy Theories on The X-Files?" Let's get cracking, people.